Some of you might be saying WHAT in the world are you talking about?  PG-13 on the beach.  I can just picture my friends who know me gasping “Nicole!”

Last weekend Joe & I took a trip to Ft. Desoto Beach.   It’s a public beach but was once you used as a Fort to protect the bay area of St. Petersburg.    Joe & I had a great time.  Our adventure on the sandy shore had a little twist.  I’ll tell you more about that later.  Let’s just say we saw bronzed assets of questionable nature.

View of the beach from the top of the Fort


Before lathering on my coconut smelling suntan lotion I made my favorite breakfast shake:   Bananas, Protein Powder, 2 tsp of Hershey’s dark cocoa, and milk mixed up in a blender.   The protein powder kept me full and the chocolate cocoa satisfied my sweet tooth.

Opening up the cabinet to get a cup, I walked away for just a quick moment to answer my cell phone.   What did I find when I came back?  hmmm MISCHIEVOUS KITTY

BUSTED!  I caught you red-handed!  Don’t worry I won’t forget to wash the plate.  Hahaha.


Since there is only the two of us,  you would think getting ready to go to the beach would be a snap.   Nope.    After putting on my bathing suit, we loaded up our gear:  beach chairs, towels, sun tan lotion and a cooler full of snacks and drinks.  OH yeah, I tossed in a magazine or two.  I figured I’d read some health magazines to get ideas for topics to blog about.   See, even when I am taking a trip away from the computer I’m always think of my readers.  Isn’t that sweet?

Now say it with me “aaaahhh”  😀


We decided to tour the Fort first because setting up camp on the beach.     The entrance to the Fort is free, although you are charged a small parking fee of $5.   I’ve been here before and on most days it’s never crowded.  You can freely roam around and touch the cannons.  I won’t go into too many details but I did a little reading on the history.  The fort dates back to the late 1800’s where the Union soldiers used the island as a blockade against the confederates.

The cannons were built around 1900.  Observations towers were built to spot enemies sailing in the Gulf.  Though the Fort was never used in any major battles.   The soldiers suffered through terrible conditions- heat, mosquitoes and isolation.  If would like to read the entire history go here.

Both the beach and the Fort are considered a county State Park.    There are several bike, walking trails, and a pier.  I saw several people parking their cars outside the park (to avoid the parking fee’s) and then taking their bicycle inside to use the path.  If you get hungry or forget to bring a towel they’ve got a snack shack and a gift shop.

You can even camp out here.  How fun would that be to camp out on the beach?  Could you imagine all the stars lighting up over the ocean?  I bet the illumination of the moon  at night probably makes the beach glow in the darkness.  The morning is just as breath-taking. I can just picture myself enjoying that cup of coffee while taking in the view of the sun rising over the sugar white sand.  PARADISE!


Joe and I walked down to the beach to set up camp after wandering around the Fort.    “Finally”, a breath of excitement came out, I was here!   The weather was a perfect 80 degrees.   The breeze tickled my skin as I laid there pondering and watching the commotion around me.  A family had a BBQ set up under an open canvas tent.  Looks like steaks where on their menu.

On my right hand side a group of older women in their 50’s were chattering  amongst themselves.    Cackling and assortment of different sounding giggles erupted from their small circle. I wondered what was so funny.  Maybe there were gossiping around Susan’s outfit at the  recent luncheon.  I’m guessing Susan wasn’t invited to their beach soiree.

Several moments of people watching passed by when Joe suggested a walk along the coast line.


The walk was relaxing.   And I even got my exercise in for the day.   Joe wanted to walk to the end of the beach.  We went there last time.  It is a quiet and private spot full of white washed trees, the roots stemming right out of the turquoise water.  That spot was perfect for picture-taking.

As we got closer to the end we start seeing some very odd sights.   Ankle deep in the water was a man.  His skin was golden-colored.  And I could see his butt!   “Oh MY goooooodness!” my voice drawled out in a southern accent.  (note:  I don’t normally sound southern except when I am in a state of surprise).

Looking closer at the scene in front of me I realized there was more than one golden bronzed booty frolicking among in the sand and in the water.     I soon realized that the men weren’t completely buck naked.  They had a g-string (I guess they didn’t want any tan lines).

Oh but wait,  THERE IS MORE….

 Covering their frontal parts was something that I can only describe as a banana hammock!

Now what kind of place did I go to you must be thinking.  Yes this is still in the good ol’ US of A.   From what I gather it looked like they were European.   Either they didn’t know the rules of public nudity or they just didn’t care.  Either way I didn’t see any beach guards enforcing the no public nudity rule.   Not sure if g-strings count as nudity or not.

Oh what adventures Joe and I run into.


We finally got to the end of the beach and near our favorite spot.  Unfortunately they had tagged off with a rope.  We got as far as we could and snapped some pictures.


We decided to eat at the Beach Wood BBQ Grill for dinner.  It was a fast decision.  The main strip of street along St. Petersburg beach was packed with Spring Breakers.   We pulled into the first restaurant we saw.   Lucky for us it was a good choice.

The restaurant was part of cute hotel next door called the Post Card Inn.  As I walked up to the front door of the restaurant I saw a gorgeous bride and her pack of bridesmaids heading into her reception.  aww weddings….I love them.     For dinner I had a grilled chicken sandwich and yes I ate the fries too.  Hey,   I could not pass up sweet potato fries.


After dinner we headed back over the Sunshine Skyway bridge to go home.   Oh man that bridge scares me.  It’s so high up!

Driving over a few smaller bridges we save a several houses, their back doors facing the water.   A few of them had the zero landscape.  Joe was so excited.  “See baby, that’s what I want to do to our yard” he practically shouted out.   Joe hates dealing with the grass.  All it does in fry in the Florida summer and gets dry during our  winters.    I grabbed my camera and took some photos for inspiration for him.

See the guy in the left hand side on his water ski? He's got his hands up in the water like he's on an amusement park ride. What a perfect shot taken in the car going 45 mph.

Oh this was taken last weekend.  This weekend Joe got to work on his zero landscaping yard.  I took pictures.  I’ll post some later!


5 thoughts on “FT. DESOTO and PG-13 ON THE BEACH

  1. FYI, g-string and thong swimwear are perfectly legal anywhere on Fort DeSoto beach. The way the law reads total nudity would be a violation. However, as long as the sex organs (genitals) are covered then it’s cool.

    • 😀 I didn’t know that. I am pretty sure he had a g-string. It really didn’t bother me that much. I was being much more dramatic on paper than in person. Have you ever seen what I was talking about?

      • See it all the time. It is perfectly legal. I wear a thong there on vacation every year and yes I’m a man. Very comfortable and relaxing not to have to wear the big wet shorts.

    • Thank you. Yeah we had a great time. Glad you like the kitty pictures. Cindy always gets into trouble everyday. Her sister Mindy, is a quieter kitty. I have a really funny photo of them tearing up some paper towel they knocked off the counter. Always an adventure at this house. 😀

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